“WE’RE HAVING TROUBLE IN THE BEDROOM”

October 26, 2025·1 hr 23 min·5 clips

A woman reveals her boyfriend's sexual performance feels fake after eight years together.

The Therapy Gecko, host Lyle, offers anonymous advice to callers in this episode titled "WE'RE HAVING TROUBLE IN THE BEDROOM." The first caller, a 25-year-old woman, has been with her 26-year-old boyfriend for eight years and is his first serious girlfriend. She expresses frustration that their sexual intimacy has lost its luster and feels her partner is performing rather than acting authentically. She wants him to be more dominant but says his attempts feel like a scripted act aimed at receiving positive feedback. Lyle advises her that her boyfriend needs to find and express his own authentic dominant energy instead of putting on a character. The caller reveals her boyfriend becomes defensive and self-critical when she brings this up, which complicates the issue. Lyle suggests she directly tell him to stop performing and to connect with his genuine desires. The second caller is Julian, a 23-year-old construction worker and longtime listener from Porterville, California. Julian's parents recently split after 27 years because his mother cheated, and he has cut off contact with her. He describes his 46-year-old father, a grape picker, who was initially depressed but now frequents local nightclubs and is dating a new woman. Julian helped his father start socializing again and feels responsible for his family, including a four-year-old daughter he had at 17 and two younger brothers. One brother, a 21-year-old musician, is using cocaine, and Julian has tried unsuccessfully to steer him away from drugs. Julian's wife is training to be a phlebotomist, and he is the family's primary financial and emotional support. He feels conflicted about meeting his father's new girlfriend and her children, as it represents an unfamiliar family dynamic. Lyle shares a personal story about initially rejecting his own stepmother to illustrate how blended families can become meaningful over time. Lyle reflects that Julian embodies adult responsibility through his care for his daughter, father, and brothers, which contrasts with Lyle's own life. The episode's tone is conversational, candid, and empathetic, blending direct advice with personal storytelling. Listeners who enjoy raw, anonymous conversations about relationships, family dynamics, and personal struggles would appreciate this episode. Those seeking highly structured advice or avoiding intimate topics might prefer to skip it.

As heard by us

An unscripted relationship call that stays on the awkward middle ground.

This episode follows a caller who has been with her boyfriend for a while and is trying to put a name to what feels off now that the relationship has settled.

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Why you'd press play

Need a blunt, weirdly kind talk about relationship trouble and what to do next?

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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